Life like Wine

Lately, I have been feeling uneasy about my future.

It started while I was listening to an incredibly dull lecture on a Tuesday evening about two weeks ago. I sat there and stared at the powerpoint screen and my mind began to wander. As I was stewing in my dislike for the class I was in, I realized that I don't enjoy most of my classes. I thought, "If this is how much I can expect to enjoy my future career, I want out."

I spent a few minutes just sitting there and feeling discouraged. I am spending so much money to be at this university. I don't want to be find myself tens of thousands of dollars in debt and six years older just to be bored with life and too poor to do anything about it. I don't want to be a career woman. I never did! With each passing thought, I saw myself taking off the peace He had dressed me with and leaving my garment of rest behind. I was becoming less and less comfortable.

But then I had a sobering thought: Your God has been wow-ing you since you have known Him- and 6 years and thousands of dollars later, He will still be your God.

I found my rest again when I remembered Him. I relaxed again and resigned to just trust Him. (That is always my favorite decision to make!)

Last night I was flipping through my Bible, and I wanted to look up verses about His promises for my future. Proverbs 23:18, Jeremiah 29:11, stuff like that. But I was distracted by the Gospel of John. Ah, it has such a lovely introduction. I started at the beginning and I kept reading it. And then I came across this:

His mother said to the servants, "Whatever He says to you, do it." Now there were six stone waterpots set there for the Jewish custom of purification, containing twenty or thirty gallons each. Jesus said to them, "Fill the waterpots with water." So they filled them up to the brim. And He said to them, "Draw some out now and take it to the headwaiter. So they took it to him. When the headwaiter tasted the water which had become wine, and did not know where it came from (but the servants who had drawn the water knew), the headwaiter called the bridegroom, and said to him, "Every man serves the good wine first, and when the people have drunk freely, then he serves the poorer wine; but you have kept the good wine until now."
-John 2:5-10

I put my Bible down and I just sat there for a few minutes, because I noticed something I had never understood before: Jesus' first miracle was entirely accomplished by obedience. Jesus did not touch a single thing! Did those servants know why they were filling these incredibly heavy jugs with insane amounts of water?

I imagined what they must have been thinking. "How is THIS supposed to get us wine? We just want wine!" And I remembered myself sitting in my Tuesday night class. "How is THIS supposed to bring me joy and glorify You? I just want a radically devoted life!"

Those people did as Jesus said, not knowing of His intentions. And wine was created. Those who knew Him knew that they had just witnessed a miracle. Those who did not know Him just knew that wine was found, and that it was some darn good wine.

I put my Bible away and thought, "I want my life to be like that."

And I felt encouraged, because I trust in His faithfulness and I know that it will be.